Starring Logan Lerman, Orlando Bloom, Ray Stevenson, Milla Jovovich, Christoph Waltz, Mads Mikkelsen, Juno Temple, Freddie Fox, Luke Evans, Matthew Macfadyen, James Corden

(5-Okay Film)

Painless. Unimpressive. Witless.

Vapid adaptation of Alexander Dumas’ classic adventure novel about D’Artagnan’s (Lerman) exploits with three rogue members of the King’s musketeers: Athos (MacFadyen), Porthos (Stevenson), and Aramis (Evans). This film focuses on their mission to foil a plot of the ruthless Cardinal Richilieu (Waltz) by returning the Queen’s stolen necklace in time for a royal ball.  Instead of a clever, sneaky job of procuring the necklace-there is some exposition about it being held in England’s most secure palace,which could have been interesting- they pretty much blow the place up and take it. How exciting. Better than the director’s past work on such manure as Mortal Kombat (1995) and Pompeii (2014), but still not good enough to recommend to someone you like. No character development and brainless.

-Walter Tyrone Howard-

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